music

Yo yo....so right now I am listening to 'Tru Dog' by Toby Macs son..and hence the 'yo yo' welcome. I find that as I put y music on shuffle, and it plays through the most random yet awesome songs on the planet, that my mood shifts with it. Now I am listening to Jars of Clay and feel somewhat subdued. It is amazing the effect that music can have on everything. You thoughts, feelings and mood. It can make you go from jumping around to reflecting on your life and feeling quite sad in the next instant. And then in the next, up and happy again! I would like to know of some other thing that could possibly do that as quickly and effectively as music. Music truly is one of the most influential things in our lives. I pity the person that does not truly appreciate music the way it demands and expects of us to admire it.

he apologizes...

I finally got the apology I have been waiting five months for. And I forgave him. Or at least, I said I forgive him. Now, I actually have to. I think it will be alot easier to do now that I know he is sorry for what happened and is learning from it. I think it just frustrates me because he said that he is learning from it now...but I am not benefiting from this knowledge...some other girl is. So the jealousy comes into play and it sucks. So I hope that you guys will pray for me and this creeping sensation of jealousy that is coming over me. I pray that I am relieved of it and can just focus on God and what I need to do to glorify Him.
On a different note, I had my first bible study of the new semester tonight and we were asked what our vision is for the next semester, 5 years from now and 50 years from now. And that was just what I needed to think about so that I could keep myself in check as I get started into my new schedule. So here are my goals:
For this semester? To be an example to my roommates and anyone I come into contact with. It has been my goal for awhile that when a random person sees my living my life, they can tell, just by watching me that I am a Christian. I want to seek after God every second of the day, not just at night when I remember to pray. I want to have pure God-centered relationships with people (and in particular, boys). I want to do well in school for His glory.
Five years from now? Hopefully married and honouring God through that relationship. I hope to either be in Africa (or have gone there for a year at least) serving the people there. Or in Med School and working towards being a doctor. Or finished my masters and working as a physiotherapist. I want to belong to a church and be involved in the ministry there. .
Fifty years from now? I want to be in heaven! But if that is too early, then I will be retired, doing missions (if I am still physically able to) with myhusband. I want to enjoy the rest of life on earth and be an amazing example of a strong believer. I want to be able to look back on my life and see it as being blameless and hold in God's eyes.
So those are some of my goals...what are yours? Let me know!! God Bless!!

a mirror of sorts

Okay, so I get quite annoyed when people haven't posted in awhile...and then I realize, it has been forever since I have either. It is so strange how that works. I once heard that the characteristics you despise the most in other people, can often be found in you too. And it is totally true. But I am not giving any examples, because that is not fair to anyone. But just think about it for yourselves. You will find that it is true...

I Still Care

This is driving me nuts!! I still care about a boy...even though I said I am okay with everything...I still miss him and am quite upset that I haven't talked to him in about forever (give or take a few weeks) and he doesn't make an effort to talk to me or come and see me at New years... He's on MSN all the time...and nothing...silence. ACK!! Why the junk do I still care? Why do I let this bug me so? And my letter is still sitting in his back pack, I bet. Not sent. Not read by me. I guess I just want to know that I am not just a memory to him...but that he still thinks about me and wonders how I am doing. Ah, I need to go pray. Ciao.